My Story

My story is not for the timid

Yeah some say it does not matter to the mental

To the present now, you wonder on what is going on

Truth be told it always will affect you

My childhood died before it began

Parts of me blocked away that I can never recover

My memory is blank, two or more years gone

I remember nothing, I miss someone I can not see

My mind has no image of her and that pains me daily

I live alone, work alone, will die alone

All for the chance to see her face again

My life should have ended a long time ago

Salvation for me was given instead of the bullet I had planned

I have been given the choice between life or death

Even without the plan of suicide

I still chose life

This is painful, this life is full of strife and tribulations

There is no easy road, guaranteed,

I am not asking for your sympathy

All anyone should seek from others is the highest form of love

Understanding

Something more to believe in outside of our own views

Aside of that, more demons figurative and literal

My story is not for the weak at heart

Neither is my life, nor is my heart

I suppose that is why it is alone

Set apart and pushed aside

This is my story

Power…Good or Bad

How much are outcasts

Looked upon with honest eyes

Realize the nature of social media

This is where most communication honestly

Explode and allow their inner thoughts to roam

Then shot down

Disregarded, embarrassed, and mocked excessively

Maybe not by the majority, there is no number too high

There is a number low enough, usually doesn’t exist

Zero, it is impossible to have the world as a whole love you

Did we forget what we learned as children?

If you do not have anything nice to say

Keep your mouth shut

Paraphrase maybe, yet that is the point

Better to speak life than to speak death to someone

Insults, Jokes, things you do to someone else for your amusement

How amusing it is for you?

Shoe on the other foot?

Fun now, yet do you care if you hurt someone?

No not really, you just worry about your image if it is shown

Grow up, move on, if you do not like them

leave them be

Next time you see a online war that ends in violence

A plea of understanding that ends in a suicide

Think about your actions towards your favorite person to pick on

What if it was them?

My Story

Soon I will tell my story

Will you read it and admire

or demolish my memory

I have told it before, it went unnoticed

This life is not about solely one moment

One decision can be a culmination of years

One year can be a culmination of 10 thoughts

Eventually I will be understood

Who am I kidding, even in death, I do not expect it

I am reminded of how society only cares when you are gone

My story will be the same

What I Give

If I believe in you, I allow you in

If I trust you, I show you my pain

If I love you, I show you my weakness

If I respect you, I show you my views

Without one of these, how much do you think I give you?

Please trust

Good women exist

All around the place

No surprises in my face

I am tired of all of this

Who pursues who

Who admires the other

I am tired, do not want to bother

This much is true

I no longer believe in the good

My decimation by the masses is enough

I am not in a sour mood

I just realize the truth, please trust

Away

Kiss me once

Take my breath away

Hold me close

Ease my fears away

Lay with me

Let me sleep the night away

Love me strongly

Make my life brighter everyday

Passion Seen

I miss your touch

Kiss on my cheek, my lips

I miss your voice

Delicate in my ear, your whispers

I miss your eyes

Gentle, yet unguarded when with me

I miss the way they close

So deep in the moment just from my touch

I will never forget

The way you bit your lip

The passion in your eyes

Love to Fight

If you love me enough

to feel that you cannot be wrong

If I love you enough to say

I always have to be right

Who are we really loving?

If all we are doing

is loving to keep a fight?

Help in War

Encourage me

I need to encourage you

There are no lines in the war for love

both sides suffer casualties

Men hurt

Women hurt

Be objective

Don’t just comfort your friend

Tell them they are right when they are wrong

Be true to them

Be true to love

Give them your real heart

Help them obtain a real heart

We all need to win this war

Why leave someone dead on the battlefield

Just so you can feel good to yourself?

Never my heart

Personal and deep to the chest

this stands out above the rest

my childhood ended at age ten

hard, stern, and fighting, it began then

Sense of dignity started at the funeral

Had to be strong for the family, lack of their worrying

Enough for them, they lost their sister or daughter

Close friend, person to confide in, I lost my mother

Irreplaceable yes, for one she lost both, too close

Sister and the baby of her children, she needs my strength the most

My face not sad at all times, there is no frown occuring

Just grew up too fast, began really young alone struggling

Solo in my own world, I let a few in and cherish them

Outside of that, I remain strange to society’s whim

It is more important to me that you are in my life

Than it probably is to you, until grief or strife

Why do you think I fight for those I care for

And swiftly remove those who respect me no more

I trust and can let down my guard for those in my heart

Those I cannot be weak for, must depart

I had to stop being weak for the main one who left my life

Never my heart